This is an issue that I have wanted to write about for some time. I would like to share piece of shoddy logic I would regularly use before or after binging out on food, when I was hugely obese. I would tell myself that my weight loss would take time. That I needed to be patient with my slow or no progress, and that I needed to forgive myself for willingly engaging in behavior that was against my goals, my dreams, of being a thinner, fitter, healthier me. I can tell you that I am talking about physically moving, that inertia, a basic law of physics doesn’t escape your mass, that you aren’t a special case like you’ve convinced yourself to be. However, I am also talking about mind play. The cyclical, harmful behavior of excusing binge eating; before and after the binge.
Being patient with yourself comes with the prerequisite understanding that you need to act, differently. That although your actions are slow, that they are moving towards your goals. It does not mean that you continue the stagnant, lazy, familiar at least, behavior that has led to your obesity, and expect different results. Einstein said “Insanity is doing the same thing over, and over, and expecting different results.”
The biggest secret lie of the weight loss industry, is that they sell the image of progress being easy, if done in the right way. Fat people want the easy way out of a, pardon my French, shitty situation. I’m just as sorry as you are, that this is one of the hardest processes I, or you, have ever attempted. Obese people that actually lose the weight are doing everyone, especially themselves, a disservice by telling everyone it took them a year or two to actually lose the weight. I have been on keto since December. I have lost 70 lbs. But it has taken me 17 years to get my mind right, to get my diet right, to care enough to change my eating behavior, my exercise behavior, and get my priorities in my life to line up with my eagerness to maintain my health. It is, has been, and will always be a process. Don’t sell yourself short. If I count all of my “failed attempts” to lose weight, I have been stagnant, negligent most of the time. But I am grateful that I went through the struggles that have led to me finding a diet that works, and put me in a position of action, in a position where I can finally be patient, instead. A great amount of my anxiety and depression did, and does come from knowing that I deserved and could do better, to work on, and preserve my health.
I only recently made a decision that I didn’t want to be on high blood pressure medication, like both of my parents, that I didn’t want to die of cancer like 3/4 of my grandparents, and that I wanted to enjoy a healthy fruitful life, while I was here. Being sick and wishing that I could do this or that, or wishing I had lived differently does nobody any favors, not only you, but the people around you. I decided to live as if I had already been diagnosed with diabetes, which based on my genetics was extremely likely if I continued to eat the way I was eating. Eating as if I had cancer, became my one priority. Patience lies in waiting for results, from your action. Relaxation comes from action as well. You relax only after you exert yourself. Love yourself enough to change, to be uncomfortable, and to live a different, better life. Then relax, rest, knowing you will wake up in better health, one forkful closer to your goal.
Chuch, Happy Eating,